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You might notice your daughter spending most of her time alone and wonder if she feels left out or unsure of how to fit in. It’s normal to worry when you see her struggling to make friends or seeming disconnected from others. This guide helps you understand what she’s going through and how you can help her develop an active social life.
Key takeaways
- Many girls feel isolated because of emotion suppression, peer rejection, or bullying.
- Excessive use of phones or social media can increase feelings of loneliness and reduce the quality of friendships.
- Poor body image and low confidence may make her afraid to be seen or open up.
- The support you offer can help her feel more secure, seen, and ready to build friendships.
- Helping her discuss her feelings or participate in group activities can help build her confidence and self-esteem over time.
Common reasons why your teenage daughter has no friends
Teen girls may withdraw socially for many reasons, and some are more hidden than others. Recognizing these can help you offer the right kind of support:
Emotion suppression & peer rejection
A 2024 study of 385 teenage girls found that hiding emotions and feeling rejected both contributed to the girls feeling lonelier.
This accounted for 34% of the girls’ reported feelings of loneliness. Girls who often hide how they feel usually:
- Hold back emotions: Hiding feelings may stop her from talking to others or asking for help. This can make friendships feel unsafe or uncomfortable, even if she wants to form a connection.
- Feel rejected by friends: Being left out or judged by classmates can hurt her self-worth. She might believe she’s not “good enough” to have friends and stop trying.
- Feel more alone over time: Without sharing feelings or being accepted, she may feel even more isolated. Making or keeping close friends outside of school can feel harder, even when she wants them.
Social media overuse and smartphone addiction
Spending too much time on phones and social media can take away opportunities to hang out with other teenagers.
In a 2024 Finnish study, teenage girls spent nearly 6 hours a day on their phones, with approximately 4 hours on social media. Around 1 in 6 showed signs of social media addiction and reported feeling lonelier and more tired.
A 2022 UK study found that teenagers experiencing social media problems also reported feeling lonely and slept less. Social media overuse often leads girls to:
- Miss out on real-world time: Spending time scrolling can keep her from talking to people face-to-face. This reduces the chances of forming or maintaining friendships.
- Sleep less and feel tired: Being online late at night can mess with her sleep. Feeling tired can make her not want to meet up with others.
Body image anxiety
A 2023 study of 632 young people found that girls with high social appearance anxiety were more likely to feel lonely.
This fear of being judged on looks was a stronger link to loneliness than social media use alone. These worries can cause girls to:
- Avoid social settings: Fear of being judged for their looks can stop her from going out. She may stay home to avoid attention or comparison.
- Feel unsafe sharing themselves: Worrying about how she appears can make her put her guard up. This can keep her from being real or close to friends.
- Use social media to hide or compare: Some girls scroll to escape or check how they measure up. But this can make them feel worse and even more alone.
Lack of support from friends and family
Feeling unsupported can make it much harder to connect with others. Girls feel lonely when they don’t feel understood by their parents or lack kind classmates. These situations often cause girls to:
- Avoid potential friends: In schools where classmates are unkind or cliquish, she may stop trying to fit in. It can feel safer to stay quiet than risk being shut out.
- Have no one to turn to: Without even one real friend, she may feel like no one truly knows her. This leaves her without support to face daily ups and downs.
- Feel alone at home: When their parents don’t understand her feelings, she might keep everything inside and pull away from everyone.
Bullying and social withdrawal
Being bullied can quickly damage trust and confidence. Research shows that girls who were bullied were 67% more likely to feel lonely than those who weren’t.
These experiences often push girls to:
- Pull away from peers: After being targeted, she may stop trying to make friends. It can feel safer to stay away than risk more pain.
- Lose trust in others: Rumors, exclusion, or teasing can leave lasting scars. She might believe no one truly wants her around.
- Hide parts of herself: To avoid attention, she may act quieter than she is. This can make socialization even harder.
How to help your teen daughter build friendship skills
When your teenager feels stuck or alone, it can be hard to know how to guide her. But there are many small ways you can support her confidence and help her find her social footing. Here are practical ways to help her start building friendships that feel safe, genuine, and lasting:
Help her feel safe expressing her feelings
Helping her share feelings comfortably can make it easier to connect and build friendships:
- Use journaling or art: Encourage her to draw or write about her day. This helps her explore feelings, which makes it easier to share with others and feel more connected.
- Talk about your feelings: Share things like, “I felt nervous today.” This makes emotional sharing feel normal and safe, which encourages her to open up in friendships.
- Practice emotional phrases: Role-play lines like, “I feel left out when…” This builds confidence, helping her communicate clearly and make stronger connections.
Encouraging your teenage daughter to express her feelings safely involves making her comfortable enough to do that. If she’s able to talk with you easily, it becomes easier for her to share what she needs socially and for you to guide her. These guides on teen communication can help you build that connection:
Support a healthy body image
Helping her feel good in her skin builds the foundation for real connection:
- Name her wins out loud: Make a habit of saying what you admire about her effort, kindness, and grit. This teaches her she’s more than just a face in the mirror.
- Model self-respect: Speak kindly about your own body and struggles. If you show it’s okay to be imperfect, she’ll learn to be kinder to herself.
- Call out the fantasy: When scrolling together, ask, “What do you think went into making this photo?” It opens space for critical thinking without turning into a lecture.
Teach basic social skills in fun ways
Social skills help her feel more comfortable with others, making it easier to socialize:
- Try ice-breaker questions: Teach her simple ice-breaker questions to start conversations, like, “What’s your favorite snack?” Practicing these gives her ready-to-use openers that can make new interactions feel less scary and more natural.
- Play listening games: Try describing a picture while she draws it. Good listening helps her understand others and be a better friend in return.
- Practice reading faces: Watch a show and pause to ask, “How do you think she feels?” Recognizing emotions in others helps her respond kindly and connect more deeply with them.
Create low-pressure chances to meet others
Casual, low-stakes settings give her space to warm up to new connections:
- Find shared-interest spaces: Clubs like art, robotics, or drama provide her with something to talk about and people to talk to. It’s easier to bond when there’s a built-in topic.
- Host something small but intentional: Invite two or three friends at school for a low-key gathering, perhaps over cookies, crafts, or a movie night. There is no pressure, just presence.
- Do good together: Volunteering at a pet shelter or local garden lets her connect without the awkward pressure of constant conversation.
Encourage healthy phone habits
Supporting healthy phone habits can give her more time and energy to connect with others:
- Set screen-free rituals: Make dinner or the first 30 minutes after school a no-phone zone, a time to connect without screens.
- Notice and name patterns: If she seems drained after scrolling, say something like, “You looked kind of down. Did anything online throw you off?” Keep it casual, not critical.
- Turn clicks into real connections: Help her find online spaces tied to real-life meetups, e.g., book clubs, gaming groups, and volunteer organizations. Not all digital time is empty.
Strengthen support through adults and mentors
Teens often need more than peers; they need older voices who show what support and belonging look like:
- Connect her with near-peer mentors: A college student, older cousin, or cool youth leader can model healthy friendships in a way that doesn’t feel like a lecture.
- Host casual mixed-age hangouts: Barbecue, movie night, game night, whatever gets a few families together. Familiar adults make socializing feel safer.
- Practice social moments together: Invite her to join you at a café or family event, then model how to introduce yourself, join a conversation, or exit one.
Get professional support when needed
Sometimes, what she’s facing is bigger than either of you can handle alone, and that’s okay. There’s support out there:
- Look into school-based programs: Some schools offer lunch groups, friendship workshops, or peer-led support sessions. These programs can help girls with social anxiety or ADHD feel less alone and more prepared to connect.
- Explore talk therapy or counseling: If she avoids connection because it feels dangerous or exhausting, a licensed counselor, especially one trained in cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or adolescent therapy, can help her unlearn those patterns and build new ones.
- Know the signs she may need more help: Constant anxiety, hopelessness, or withdrawal are more than just “teen stuff.” These signs may point to social anxiety or co-occurring issues that need professional care.
Final thoughts
Watching your daughter struggle to connect can feel heartbreaking. But even the smallest steps you take to understand and support her can open the door to new friendships. With your steady encouragement, she can start feeling more confident, more at ease around others, and more hopeful about finding people with whom she can truly connect.
Taking the next steps
Helping your daughter build a social life doesn’t mean changing who she is; it means showing up, listening, and supporting her in ways that feel doable and real. The guides below can help you keep that support going:
- How to help an autistic child make friends — If your daughter has autism or is neurodivergent, this guide offers inclusive and compassionate advice to help her make new friends.
- 9 Self-esteem activities for teens — Build her inner confidence so she feels more ready to reach out to others.
- Active listening skills: how to listen to your teen — Learn ways to make her feel truly heard without jumping in to fix.
- Teen loneliness — Understand the emotional toll of isolation and how to reassure and guide her back toward socializing with peers.
- How to help your teenage son make friends — If you’re also supporting a teenage son, this guide may be helpful.
Residential Treatment for Teens
If your teen often feels overwhelmed, shuts down, or reacts with intense emotions they can’t seem to manage, they may need more support than what’s possible at home.
Our residential program helps teens understand their feelings, learn coping skills, and practice healthy emotional responses.
We support families in our facilities in Arizona and Idaho.
Call for more information.
(855) 506-1906
Sources
- Özdemir, M., Ben Amor, L., & Hakobyan, A. (2024). Emotion Suppression and Peer Rejection as Predictors of Loneliness in Female Adolescents. Journal of Adolescent Research. Retrieved from https://journals.kmanpub.com
- Azhari, N. A., Toms, Z., Pavlopoulou, G., Esposito, G., & Dimitriou, D. (2022). Social Media Use in Female Adolescents: Associations with Anxiety, Loneliness, and Sleep Disturbances. Acta Psychologica, 229, 103706. Retrieved from https://www.researchgate.net/publication/359921853
- Kosola, S., Ahlqvist, L., Niemelä, S., et al. (2024). Smartphone Use and Well-Being of Adolescent Girls: A Population-Based Study. Archives of Disease in Childhood. Retrieved from https://www.researchgate.net/publication/374601509
- Papapanou, T. K., et al. (2023). Strong Correlations between Social Appearance Anxiety, Use of Social Media, and Feelings of Loneliness in Adolescents and Young Adults. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 20(5), 4296. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph20054296
- Marthoenis, D., Dahlia, & Nassimbwa, J. (2022). Prevalence and Factors Associated with Loneliness among Indonesian Female Adolescents: A Cross-Sectional Study. BMC Women’s Health, 22, 328. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12905-022-01909-5